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iamApropos

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iamApropos last won the day on August 2 2016

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About iamApropos

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  1. My adventures must come to an end.

    Whats Up Y'all!!? For those of you who don’t know, my name is Paul and for nearly 4 years I've been iamApropos online. To recap a little, in 2007 I became permanently disabled from an aneurysm leaving me with multiple disabilities that changed my life. For years I had to learn to cope with my new limitations and tried to find something I could do to help people and feel productive. Nearly 4 years ago I started helping people build gaming computers by utilizing skype as I walked people through building their first computers all while broadcasting it onto twitch and uploading it onto youtube. I quickly learned that I enjoyed broadcasting game play and entertaining people more than helping people build computers. I had a vision of bringing others together who suffer from social anxiety, depression, or any disabilities that may limit the ability to have a social life. Gaming helped me get through the most difficult times I've had in my life and helped me cope with my disability and I wanted to help others the same way by bringing them together in a community of gamers. Over the last year and a half my health has been degrading permanently as I knew it was going to and its caused me to struggle with my priorities as iamApropos and leader of the AteamGC as well as being a husband, son, brother and nephew. With a sad heart and much deliberation I announce I'm officially retiring as iamApropos. Not everyone is going to understand why and some won't care but if you'll allow me to explain. I've been struggling for over a year now with my health and living situation as well as depression. in the last 6 months my health, as most of you know, has degraded changing my living dynamic, changing what I can and can't do. The battle I've been fighting with is whether or not I can continue as iamApropos. My love for this community and passion for bringing people together battles with my new inability to have the mental, emotional, and physical strength to do live broadcasts or stress about administering the community. The problem I have is complex as it involves family, health and more. Because of the degrading health I'm having less and less ability to focus or have the strength needed to do much of daily life let alone anything else. I've had to sit down and seriously contemplate my situation. Because of my new limitations, if I do something that takes my energy, strength or focus and depletes it, I'm then unable to do anything else. So because of this I've had to seriously look at what I should prioritize with the limited strength and energy I have. If I keep stressing about being iamApropos, broadcasting, administering the community I then have to sacrifice my time and responsibilities as a husband, nephew, brother and son. This has me devastated... Do I continue doing iamApropos and the AteamGC and have no energy, strength or focus for my family? Or do I use my new limited strength, energy and focus on supporting my wife and family? I do consider a lot of you my online family but after weighing all my options the latter of using my energy to support my wife and family seems to be the only reasonable and responsible option I currently have and the only option that makes sense to helping me be truly happy instead of feeling like I'm neglecting my wife and family. If I keep stressing over things I can no longer do I end up creating a situation I cant fix which spirals me into deep depression as I feel obligated to broadcast and lead the AteamGC. This stress further adds to depleting my limited energy, focus and strength which prevents me from being able to do the things I need to do for my wife and family which I've been neglecting for years now. I absolutely love the adventure I've had over the last three and a half years. You all have helped make it amazing over this time and the friends I've made being iamApropos are priceless to me. But my smiles, laughs and happy appearance on the outside have been lies to try and force myself to be happy while I suffer from massive depression and force myself to struggle through trying to continue doing this feeling like I'm neglecting my wife and family focusing on my own selfish desires to be an online entertainer and community leader. I know some will feel like I'm abandoning them or taking advantage of something or other and I cant apologize enough if I've caused anyone to feel this way. Truly you may never understand how much you all mean to me and how much you've impacted my life. I can honestly say I wouldn't have been able to survive the last three and a half years if it wasn't for each and everyone of you, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything you've done for me and for this community. I've spent the last month dreadfully miserable contemplating suicide on multiple occasions. I've had at least 6 emotional break downs completely losing my ability to stay positive and supportive to my family. I've neglected family responsibilities trying to force myself to do things I no longer can do because I didn't want to let go of iamApropos and the AteamGC. But reasonably and responsibly for my family, my wife, and for my own peace of mind I need to make a drastic change and re evaluate what I'm doing and what will bring me true joy. Tried telling myself "just hold on and stop stressing about broadcasting or administrating the community until you feel better." But sadly I cant, and the more I cant the more it stresses me out and that causes my depression to worsen which sends me down a dark hole that causes me to spend even more time away. More time away from not just the community but my wife and family near by. I've turned off my gamewisp subscriptions as I did my patreon. I will be leaving the community in the hands of the current admin group, no one person is going to be left in charge and I encourage you to work together with the administrators. They'll be starting a community gamewisp to help cover community expenses. I'm truly sorry that I've let this go on for so long giving unfounded hope that I may be able to keep doing iamApropos however I hoped, maybe blindly, and wished I didn't have to make this decision. I've been holding on for so long trying to excuse myself and by doing so I feel I've hurt some of you and I truly hope deep down you understand at least a little of what I'm going through and why I've felt this is the only decision I can come up with in order to find happiness in the miserable state I'm in. For now I can no longer torture myself by stressing over all the responsibilities that come with being iamApropos and leading the community while seeing myself neglect my wife and my family. ***The community members still waiting on their plushie abombs, and still want them, can expect them to be shipped by the end of August as they are finished.*** Again I thank all of you for everything you've done and for all the support you've shown me over the years and I'm sorry for any problems I've caused by this decision. I wish nothing but the best for all of you and hope you find peace, happiness, and joy in what ever you do. With my heart heavy and this being my last post as iamApropos I'll leave you with a final - Now that's what's up!!! ~ Paul
  2. August Game Day Event

    until
    12 hours of gaming. Bringing gamers together once a month on every 2nd Saturday of every month!
  3. test 2

    This is a test for scheduling test broadcaster schedule tests
  4. Test 1

    This is a test for scheduling test broadcaster schedule tests
  5. Pokemon GO!

    These are just some of the pokemon I've caught before I ran out of pokeballs. Primeape was in my kitchen. Charmeleon and Eevee were in my kitchen and Pikachu was in my bedroom! Where have you captured your favorite pokemon!? and what kind of adventures have you been on while hunting?
  6. Thank you Ateam

    very well put!
  7. Thank you Ateam

    Charles, A lot of us in this community on so many different levels have suffered one way or another and I know we may not ever be able to directly understand what you may be feeling or going through. With that being said I know I wont be the only one that shares in my thoughts when I say our hearts and prayers are with you and your family. I've gone through loss in my life and the only thing that helps me continue to cope with it is by not being a lone no matter how much I wanted to. Being alone in your own mind and emotions right now can be very dangerous and I encourage you to please if and when you need come hangout talk, listen, and game! I may not be online as much but I try and hangout in text chat on discord as much as possible. In short we're here for you if you need us!
  8. Pokemon GO!

    Post your pokemon go adventures here! At first I didn't know what all the hype was about as the program on my tablet was very glitchy and it seemed all you did was go around catching Pokemon. My problem was that I cant get around easily by myself so having to leave my place to capture pokemon is going to have to wait until I could get someone to assist me. All the sudden pokemon started appearing around my house and the hunt was ON! Lets see your captured pokemon and hear your stories of adventure!
  9. Ateam Gaming Community Hype!

    Community Hype During my streams I greatly appreciate everyone who comes to chat and actively participates with the community. Community hype is my way of showing my appreciation and love for the community. Most broadcasters do not allow anyone to self promote during their streams in fact most broadcasters will ban you if you promote anything about yourself or any content you might be creating on the internet. I know for a fact that if it wasn't for the community that actively participates and supports me and my online content I'd wouldn't have a reason to continue. What is community hype? At a specific time during the stream I allow active viewers to promote their social media and or online content. When is community hype? I will announce exactly when community hype starts and only during this time of the stream will self promoting be allowed. What can I post during community hype? If you create content on the internet dealing with computers and or gaming you are welcome to post your social media links. Do NOT spam repeatedly the same link. I encourage you to provide a small description of your content along with the link. Who is allowed to post and what type of links are allowed during community hype? EVERYONE! Type of links allowed: Online content creation pages and social media such as Youtube, Twitch, facebook, twitter, hitbox. Type of links not allowed: Personal donation and or fund raiser, patreon, paypal, merchandise etailer shops are not allowed. Alternative community websites are also not allowed. If it isn't a content creation page or social media page it most likely isn't allowed. Community hype is about bringing awareness to the online content you create and to help the community grow. Together we can help change the normal selfish attitude most communities have so we can grow a giving and thriving community and hopefully attract many more people with similar desires. Please do not abuse this privilege or take advantage of my kindness because that will end up ruining it for everyone. Thank you everyone who actively support the community and I can't wait to see you next stream! Now Thats Whats Up!!! ~ iamApropos
  10. July Game Day Event!

    until
    Whats Up Y'all!!? The AteamGC Monthly Game Day Event revolves around bringing people together to play video games. This event allows people to know which day, which games, and who are expecting to come and game. The Ateam Gaming Community is hosted by iamApropos live http://www.twitch.tv/iamApropos all announcements, giveaways and live interaction will be made through this channel. The event officially starts at 12pm Saturday July 16th 2016 and goes until Midnight Central. Giveaways are not announced because we dont want people showing up only for what is being given away, however only those signed up to participate in the event are eligible for any giveaways that may happen during the event. This is not an exclusive event and we welcome Everyone to join and all you have to do is click the link to the forum thread for this event and follow the rules on how to sign up: If you have any questions about this event please feel free to ask. For anyone who'd like to contribute to the event I encourage you to email me: iamApropos@gmail.com Lets start planning for another amazing event. Now Thats Whats Up!!! ~ Paul
  11. July Game Day Event

    *** ANNOUNCEMENT *** To go along with our motto "Stop Gaming Alone" we've started a once a month game day. What is the Community Game Day Event? The community game day is a scheduled day of gaming in which people who want to participate sign up and suggest games they'd like to play with others. This allows people to know that one day a month during specific hours a list of people want to play games. We gather together centralized in the Ateam Gaming Community Discord and play games together. The Event is hosted live on twitch.tv/iamApropos in which all announcements and giveaways will take place. In case iamApropos can not host the event live participants are still encouraged to meet in Discord and enjoy the day gaming together without the live broadcast. This event is being hosted by iamApropos and the Ateam Gaming Community we'll have the event centrally focused on one iamApropos twitch channel to make things easier for coordinating the event, announcements and giveaways. If people wish to live broadcast the event that is fine but they will need to use their own specific broadcast channel in Discord, if you'd like to plan on broadcasting the event please contact an admin to have your room created if it isn't already. The live broadcast is to allow everyone who can't participate in the event to be able to still enjoy being part of the community activity. Though it is appreciated that everyone enjoys socializing we will try to have specific individuals throughout the day plan to head up starting gaming activities / groups. When is the Community Monthly Game Day Event!? The Ateam Gaming Community Monthly Game Day Event is to be held the 2nd Saturday of every month. Next Game Day Event is scheduled here: How does the Community Game Day Event work? The forum post will allow people to sign up indicating who and how many people plan to attend. Also when you sign up you can suggest which games you'd like to play during this event. By suggesting games that you'd like to play it'll allow others who also may be interested to download the games ahead of time.How long will each Game Day Event last? We'll plan for the event to last 12 hours from 12pm CST until 12am CSTWho is able to participate? This event is not limited to only the Ateam Gaming Community. We welcome anyone to join the event and stop gaming alone! You never know who may show up and game as we've had surprise V.I.P.'s jump in and game from time to time.Where will everyone meet? For people interested in gaming we will be utilizing the Ateam Gaming Community Discord for this event: http://www.discord.me/AteamGC For those who want to watch the event live: http://www.twitch.tv/iamApropos How do I sign up for this event? All you need to do is reply indicating that you plan on attending the event. In the same reply provide your Discord, Steam, Origin and possibly Uplay names and don't forget to suggest games you'd like to play. Now Thats What's Up!!! Suggested Games: Battlefield 4 Rocket League The Culling Insurgency Evolve Team Fortress 2 Participants: Host - @iamApropos @kaaipucca @Deken112 Giveaways: To be determined. Only those signed up to attend the event are qualified to win any giveaways that may take place during the event and are subject to other rules depending on the giveaway.
  12. Whats Up Y'all!!? Instead of me going on and on about how awesome I think the Ateam Gaming Community aka AteamGC is this thread is to let the members of this community tell everyone what this community means to them, their story of joining the community and how being part of this community has impacted their lives. Now That's What's Up!!! ~ Paul
  13. Pros & Cons of moving to Discord from Gamevox

    Thanks for your feedback bud! Completely agree with the chit chat though the only thing different is, I believe you are noticing those of us able to connect to mobile typing more so because we weren't able to be on gamevox before so it wasn't seen and now discord is flooded with us being able to connect to text chat but unable to voice chat. I too prefer voice chat but with my current health right now I must rely on text chat. I recall that the last couple weeks before discord people were complaining that Gamevox was empty which somewhat seems to have transfered onto discord. Easy fix is to have people start getting use to using voice channels when gaming not just general hangouts but a specific game voice chat and if one isn't available an admin will be more than willing to make it.
  14. Whats up y'all!!? When I think of the AteamGC I try to find more ways for us to unite together and be able to connect with each other easier especially it will benefit the majority for the greater good of the AteamGC. Gamevox is great and it has served us well. It will also always be there as I am sponsored with it for life. However after comparing it to Discord there are a lot of limitations with Gamevox. Discord allows more of our community to connect with each other. I have carefully considered the Pros and Cons of moving from Gamevox to Discord and the Pros far out weigh any of the Cons. So by carefully considering the benefit of the majority within the AteamGC I have decided to fully move us to Discord: http://www.discord.me/AteamGC To connect using the above link - 1. make sure you have a verified email on your discord account. 2. First connection using that link needs to be done via a browser. After you've connected first via a browser you can proceed to connect using Browser / Mobile / Desktop app. Be sure to read the rules carefully and abide by them as Admins / Moderators will start strictly enforcing the rules to keep the peace. When we need Gamevox as a group it'll be available however starting July 1st 2016 it will be password locked. If you have issues with discord / connectivity ect.. please let the admins know as most issues have easy fixes. I appreciate everyones support and understanding that this move isn't based on anything negative but rather to encourage bringing more of our community members together. In the last 2 weeks we've seen far more people joining Discord and being active than we'd ever seen in discord. If you have any questions please feel free to discuss this move here: http://iamapropos.com/index.php?/forums/topic/176-ateamgc-moves-to-discord/ Now That's What's Up!!!
  15. AteamGC moves to Discord!

    Whats up y'all!!? When I think of the AteamGC I try to find more ways for us to unite together and be able to connect with each other easier especially it will benefit the majority for the greater good of the AteamGC. Gamevox is great and it has served us well. It will also always be there as I am sponsored with it for life. However after comparing it to Discord there are a lot of limitations with Gamevox. Discord allows more of our community to connect with each other. I have carefully considered the Pros and Cons of moving from Gamevox to Discord and the Pros far out weigh any of the Cons. So by carefully considering the benefit of the majority within the AteamGC I have decided to fully move us to Discord: http://www.discord.me/AteamGC To connect using the above link - 1. make sure you have a verified email on your discord account. 2. First connection using that link needs to be done via a browser. After you've connected first via a browser you can proceed to connect using Browser / Mobile / Desktop app. Be sure to read the rules carefully and abide by them as Admins / Moderators will start strictly enforcing the rules to keep the peace. When we need Gamevox as a group it'll be available however starting July 1st 2016 it will be password locked. If you have issues with discord / connectivity ect.. please let the admins know as most issues have easy fixes. I appreciate everyones support and understanding that this move isn't based on anything negative but rather to encourage bringing more of our community members together. In the last 2 weeks we've seen far more people joining Discord and being active than we'd ever seen in discord. If you have any questions please feel free to ask and we look forward to seeing you in discord! Now That's What's Up!!!
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